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Kev,
let's address the second image. one of the portrait rules i have lived by was
"leaving more room in front of than behind the subject." when a subject is looking off camera, the viewer will follow their lead. in this case there is an abrupt halt. the veil area would be considered wasted space and uninteresting. when doing a two-thirds view of the face, try to capture a little bit of skin on the far to "hold the eye in its socket." the image also has a strong diagonal line running through the middle of it due to the redness of her skin and the white veil. on the plus side, she is looking up some which tightens her chin. leaning body and lifting the chin is very flattering.
regards,
john
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